I want to ask my brother to forgive someone. What do you recommend as my first step in approaching him?

I first would acknowledge his inner hurt from what happened. As he is aware of this inner hurt, you then could ask him if he would like to reduce that hurt and possibly re-establish a relationship that now might be strained. If he has the hurt and is motivated to reduce hurt and re-establish the relationship (at least as far as he can, knowing that the others have to do their part), then it is very important that you discuss exactly what forgiveness is and what it is not. To forgive is to be good to those who have not been good to us. To forgive is not to excuse unjust behavior, or to develop moral amnesia (so it does not reoccur), to necessarily or automatically reconcile, or to abandon a quest for justice. He needs a clear view of what he will be doing if he decides to forgive.

For additional information, see Forgiveness Defined.

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