Is Self-Forgiveness a Contradiction Unto Itself?
Some say that self-forgiveness cannot exist because we cannot be our own judge and the defendant at the same time.
Yet, it seems to me that when we forgive we are never in a court of law. Instead we are in a non-judgmental area of love. If we can offer other moral virtues to the self, such as patience and kindness, then why cannot we also offer forgiveness to ourselves, a gentle loving acceptance of self, not because of the injustice we have done, but in spite of this? The “how to” of self-forgiveness is discussed briefly in this blog post: “The Toughest of All–Forgiving Oneself.”
At the same time, the critics of self-forgiveness do have a good point. We both are the victim and the offender. Therefore, we must do more in self-forgiveness than we do in forgiving others. If we have hurt others by our actions requiring self-forgiveness, then we need to go to those others and seek their forgiveness.
Dr. Bob
The idea of being able to love yourself is as ancient as the Hebrew literature, which tells us to love our neighbor as we love ourselves.