Forgiveness News
Husband says he begged God to forgive his wife after she killed her four children and herself
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On February 19 of this year, Gina Vivinetto on the website Today (https://www.today.com/parents/tranyelle-harshman-murder-suicide-kids-rcna192839) reported on a tragic murder and suicide by a woman and her four children. The woman was suffering from both postpartum depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The husband, Cliff Harshman, in an act of heroism, reported that he “begged God to forgive her” as Tranyelle was lying on her hospital bed. He said that he does not view her “as a monster” because she was both a loving wife and mother. He reflected on his wife’s struggles over the past five years, concluding that she was very troubled and was unable to overcome the psychological challenges.
Forgiving Infidelity Is Not Easy
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In another recent post (December 17, 2024) on infidelity within a committed relationship, this time on chafai (https://chatfai.com/notes/she-forgave-him-18uvta), Hilary hahn (the last name is not capitalized in the post) goes back and forth on the theme of forgiveness. In her case, the emotional wounds still are very fresh because, in her words, “It’s been a few days since that incident…..” She courageously states that she is in stunned disbelief. Forgiving him “feels like an insurmountable task.” Near the end of the post, she is hoping that in the future she “will look back on this moment as a turning point, a moment where compassion triumphed over hatred, and love conquered all.” This is a very noble statement, given the freshness of her emotional wounds.
Forgiving Infidelity in a Marriage
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In an August 12, 2024, post on MentalHealth.com, Dana Vince reports on a married couple, Toby and Shannon, who overcame a year-long affair that Toby had with an ex-girlfriend from college. What helped was for each of them to see the weaknesses that each brought to that year. For Toby, he opened up about a conflicted family while growing up and being bullied in the past by peers. He brought a feeling of inadequacy into the marriage, and when Shannon began to work long hours, his feelings of inadequacy increased. Shannon, in their time of forgiveness, seeking forgiveness, and reconciliation, began to give more attention to the marriage so that Toby felt more of a sense of commitment on her part and on his. Their exploring weaknesses was not to find excuses for the affair but instead to better understand each other, aid each other in their weaknesses, and increase confidence in the marriage. It worked and they developed a qualitatively better marriage than prior to the challenging year.
IFI Researcher presents forgiveness intervention findings at recent New York conference
Dr. Nahlah Mandurah, who is a researcher at our International Forgiveness Institute, presented her forgiveness intervention research with post-divorced women in Saudi Arabia this October at the Association for Moral Education in New York:
Mandurah, N. & Enright, R.D. (2024, October 24). The effectiveness of a forgiveness intervention as a post-divorce program in Saudi Arabia. Paper presented at the Association for Moral Education annual meeting, Queens, New York.
How can educators empower students to solve conflict with forgiveness?
Dr. Suzanne Freedman
Dr. Suzanne Freedman, a professor of human development and interpersonal forgiveness at the University of Northern Iowa and longtime team member of the IFI, recently gave an interview to an education website on how forgiveness can be helpful in conflict resolution among children and youth.
Check out the story by clicking on this link!
