Do You Want to Become a Forgiving Person?

“I hope you are beginning to see that forgiveness is not only something The Forgiving Life-Coveryou do, nor is it just a feeling or a thought inside you. It pervades your very being. Forgiveness, in other words, might become a part of your identity, a part of who you are as a person. Try this thought on for size to see if it fits: I am a forgiving person. Did that hurt or feel strange? Try it again. Of course, to say something like this and then to live your life this way will take plenty of practice. Part of that practice is to get to know the entire process of forgiveness.”

Excerpt (page 79) from the book, The Forgiving Life: A Pathway to Overcoming Resentment and Creating a Legacy of Love, by Dr. Robert Enright, Ph.D.


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Categories: New Ideas, Our Forgiveness Blog


  1. Bertha says:

    We all have to be careful of the superficialities of the academic world. Too many johnny-come-latelies are trying to make a mark for themselves and their scholarship is actually watering down the message of forgiveness. This post is just the opposite. As you continue with your faithfulness to this concept, I can see that your own views are maturing. Forgiveness is not just an act. It is a way of transforming a person into a more mature person who can then give love even while hurting. I see that now.

  2. Samantha says:

    It is becoming clear to me that forgiveness described as an action is incomplete. We tend so often to think of forgiveness as a particular act against unfair treatment, but as you describe it, forgiveness pervades our very being, how we think and feel and who we are. This does not seem to be an idiosyncratic view, but one that makes sense in terms of the truth.

  3. Charles says:

    Aristotle said that the mark of maturity was a love of the virtues. To love the virtues is to interiorize them. It is when forgiveness is interiorized, gets inside of us, that we are beginning to mature in this difficult virtue.

  4. Beth says:

    It takes a lot of maturity to see this and it takes a lot of will to bring it about. Yet the alternative of not doing all of this is to have missed the opportunity of becoming a better person.

  5. Ann Marie says:

    I am at the beginning stages of trying to learn how to truly forgive. Intellectually I know how badly
    my soul needs and desires this. Unfortunately my heart and head try fervently to hold onto this
    ugly anger and let it fester. Just hope I find the way. What little I have read on this site gives me
    great encouragement. Thank You.

  6. Jamie says:

    Ann Marie, I, too, find great encouragement from this site. This is like a forgiving community in which we can encourage each other. Keep at it. There are a lot of people on this site also struggling to shed the toxins of resentment. We can do this…as we encourage one another.


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