Author Archive: directorifi
Worldwide Requests for Our Research Tools and Forgiveness Curriculum Guides
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Since the beginning of 2025, our International Forgiveness Institute has received requests for our forgiveness research tools and forgiveness curriculum guides from the following 40 countries:
Argentina, Australia, Austria, Brazil, Canada, Chile, Columbia, Egypt, El Salvador, France, Germany, Greece, Hong Kong, India, Indonesia, Israel, Italy, Japan, Malaysia, Netherlands, New Zealand, Nigeria, Panama, Peru, the Philippines, Poland, Portugal, Serbia, South Africa, Spain, Saudi Arabia, South Korea, Switzerland, Taiwan, Tunisia, Turkey, United Kingdom, United States, Vietnam, and Zimbabwe.
Suppose there are five family members and they have a norm of angry outbursts among these members. Further, suppose that one and only one of these family members learns to forgive and starts applying it directly in the family. Do you think this one person could change the pattern of anger outbursts in the family?
Even one person could alter the norms of angry outbursts in a family, but it likely would take time, especially if the others resist. Yet, even one person who perseveres in forgiveness, discusses it temperately when appropriate, and shows restraint from the outbursts could change the norm. After all, norms occur when most people agree, even unconsciously, on ways of proceeding with one another. This one person’s changed pattern could alter the family pattern, especially when others see the gentleness in the one who forgives and begin to admire the results. So, if you are the one motivated to forgive in the face of the norm of outbursts, I definitely encourage you to do this, and over time.
Can you recommend some reading for me regarding forgiving myself? I am guilty of acting unfairly toward some other people, and I want to unburden myself of this. I want to be sure to forgive myself in an accurate way, and so I do not want to just pick up any reading material with the words “self-forgiveness” in it.
I have a book entitled 8 Keys to Forgiveness. One of those eight keys is a chapter on self-forgiveness. I first go through some controversies about self-forgiveness and argue for its legitimacy. I then lead you through a pathway of self-forgiveness in that chapter.
If forgiveness is being good to those who are not good to the forgiver, then what is the difference between forgiveness and altruism as moral virtues?
Both forgiveness and altruism are centered on generosity toward others. A major Specific Difference (to use an Aristotelian term) between the two is that forgiveness always takes place in the context of being treated unjustly by others. Altruism, in contrast, usually takes place toward others in need who did not act unjustly toward the one who generously gives. As examples, altruism occurs when a person gives funds to a charity or gives some funds to a person without a home.
College Students, Forgiveness, and Well-Being
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In a study of 463 Spanish university students done in 2025, the researchers reported positive correlations among forgiveness, hope, and self-esteem. They reported negative correlations among forgiveness and anger, anxiety, and depression. The authors suggest that preparing the students for a healthy entry into the workplace as adults could be enhanced if universities had forgiveness programs for the students.
The reference to the article is this:
Bonete S, Molinero C, Sendra S and González De Abreu AM (2025) A path to better mental health among emerging adults: forgiveness as a solution to interpersonal conflicts. Frontiers in Psychology, 16:1477283. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2025.1477283
