Author Archive: directorifi
Forgiveness on the Killing Fields of Cambodia
The Huffington Post – As a boy of eleven, Sokreaksa Himm and his Cambodian family were forced-marched from their home in Siem Reap out into the rural area to work in farming. It was there that he watched as the villagers hacked to death his father and brothers and later his mother. Lying under dead bodies in the pit in which the killers had dumped their victims, he waited until they left to make his escape.
Himm was one of the lucky ones. “The killing fields” of Cambodia were as foreboding as “The ovens” of Auschwitz. In four years — 1975-1979 — as many as three million Cambodians were killed by the Khmer Rouge regime or died from starvation or disease. As a result, Khmer Rouge leader Pol Pot is sometimes described as “the Hitler of Cambodia.”
After Himm escaped from his family’s killers, he was able to cross the border into Thailand and was eventually sent to Canada where he was cared for by World Vision (an international Christian relief organization) at one of their refugee centers. There, his young mind was not only plagued by the memory of his family now dead — with the exception of his sister — but feelings of revenge for those who had so devastated his family and his life. Those feelings began to change, however, after he enrolled at Providence University College near Winnipeg, Canada–a school that proclaims: We help you see your education through a Christian worldview.
“I could tell that something was wrong with me, and underneath the fa??ade I suddenly realized that I needed to forgive totally,” Himm recalls.??”Forgiveness is not easy, but if I allowed the big ball of fire to keep burning inside my heart, my life would not be worth living. . . When I could not forgive, I was actually burying myself into the grave of bitterness, anger and hatred.”
Determined, Himm returned to Cambodia and to the village of Kokpreach where he met with the man who killed his father and the one who killed his mother. He tied a Cambodian scarf around each of their necks as a symbol of forgiveness. Then he gave them a Cambodian Bible and read from Luke 23:34 — “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do…” — and in so doing, offered his forgiveness.
Himm has since found his sister and returned to his family home in Siem Reap where he’s determined to build a new and better life for himself and his fellow Cambodians.
Read the full story: “A Face in Pol Pot’s Killing Fields.”
Grieving Partner Offers Forgiveness at Man’s Sentencing
The New Zealand Herald, Auckland, New Zealand – Ricki Cobb was enjoying a ride through the countryside on his motorcycle when a heavily-loaded trailer towed by Donald Wills’ car hit a guardrail and jack-knifed into the path of the motorcycle, colliding with it and killing its rider instantly. At Wills’ sentencing for careless driving, the dead man’s partner Hera Edwards told the court not only of the sorrow Cobb’s death had brought to her in the 18-months since the fatal crash, but also of her willingness to forgive Wills.
Edwards said nothing could ever be done to replace Cobb or to make up for his absence in her life or the lives of their three girls–aged 9, 6 and 4–nor would he ever be forgotten.
“This is not about forgetting, we will never forget, but it is about forgiving,” Edwards said. “I offer my forgiveness and the forgiveness of my family.”
The sentencing came in the wake of a Restorative Justice conference and an offer by Wills that was described by Judge Bill Hastings as being a “generous offer” driven by genuine remorse.
Judge Hastings said that while Edwards and Wills “came from different worlds, they are not so different they can’t recognize the good in each other and I can see you are both good people.”
Judge Hastings added, “Many victim impact statements read to courts are fueled by anger which prohibits healing, but Ms. Edwards, your statement rises above, from a basis of sorrow which embraces forgiveness. Both of you have shown a generosity of spirit to leave this courtroom and live your lives well.”
Read the full story: “Grieving partner offers forgiveness at man’s sentencing.”
Nigerian Bloodbath May End as Two Sides Pledge Forgiveness
Premium Times, Abuja, Nigeria – After years of devastating communal bloodbath with heavy casualties on both sides, the Fulanis (one of Nigeria’s three major ethnic groups) and Beroms (one of Nigeria’s major aborigine ethnic groups) say they have forgiven each other and resolved to co-exist peacefully.
The guerilla-fashioned violence had been characterized by deadly midnight attacks, killing of farmers and herdsmen on the fields, destruction of farmlands, as well as the killing and rustling of cows. Thousands were reportedly killed in the bloodbath that persisted.
The peace talks were uniquely initiated by the warring communities themselves. Haruna Boro, who led the Fulani team, declared that his community had forgiven all and was prepared for peace.
“We have resolved to forgive and forge ahead,” he said. “We want the Beroms to demonstrate equal forgiving spirit because we have resolved never to attack anyone any longer.”
For their part, the Beroms said they have also forgiven. Our parents taught us to love everyone. In fact, my own father built a house for his Fulani neighbor,” said Moday Dalyop, a Berom elder. “But we teach our children a different thing and that is why they take up arms against each other.”
Read the full story: “Peace may return to Plateau as Fulani, Berom meet; pledge forgiveness”
Forgiveness Eases the Heartbreak
KSL.com, Salt Lake City, UT – In February 2010, the entire Toone family–Nathan, Brenda and their four children–became ill from what they initially thought was food poisoning. When 4-year-old Rebecca took a turn for the worst, she was rushed to the hospital where she later died. Three days later, 15-month-old Rachel passed away, too.
Investigators later blamed the girls’ deaths on fumes from rat poison that a technician placed too close to the Toone’s home. In the midst of their grief, the Toone family did something no one expected. They immediately expressed forgiveness. And according to Nathan, expressing forgiveness so soon after the deaths felt like the right thing to do.
“It didn’t feel at the time like a hard thing to do,” he said. “You don’t know what you’re capable of until you’re asked to be put through it. We knew that the technician who was responsible for the deaths of our girls didn’t do it intentionally. Bad things happen. I think that in general you need to look for the best in people.”
Brenda agreed. “I felt that desire to forgive just hours after Rebecca passed away,” she said. “I think part of it has to do with wanting be the kind of person that my daughters can still be proud of.”
Read the full story: Family of girls killed by pesticide talk about forgiveness, lessons learned.“
Shooter, Victim Work Together to Teach Prisoners About Forgiveness
RTV6-ABC, Indianapolis, IN – Twenty years ago, Misty Wallace was using a payphone when Keith Blackburn walked up and shot her in the face, point-blank. Wallace was a high school senior with a full-ride college scholarship. Blackburn was a drop-out looking to steal a car, and he didn’t want any witnesses.
Blackburn spent nine years in prison while Wallace miraculously recovered and went on with her life, carrying anger and yearning for one answer: Why? Two years after making contact with Blackburn to try to get an answer to that question, Wallace determined that forgiveness was a choice she had to make for her own health.
According to Blackburn, “Twenty years ago I did what she didn’t deserve. Two years ago she gave me what I know I didn’t deserve — I didn’t deserve to be forgiven on this level.”
Wallace and Blackburn now tell their story together as part of the Bridges to Life program, speaking to prisoners about forgiveness and about the lifetime impact of their crimes. They call themselves friends.
“She’s choosing not only to forgive me, but to walk alongside of me and tell this story to others that are struggling with pain and bitterness and anger,” Blackburn said. The two hope to eventually tell their story at every correctional facility in Indiana.
Watch the news report and read the full story: “Shooter, victim work together to teach prisoners about forgiveness, life-long impact of crime”
