Tagged: “Couples”
Husband says he begged God to forgive his wife after she killed her four children and herself
Image by Raphael Brasileiro, Pexels.com
On February 19 of this year, Gina Vivinetto on the website Today (https://www.today.com/parents/tranyelle-harshman-murder-suicide-kids-rcna192839) reported on a tragic murder and suicide by a woman and her four children. The woman was suffering from both postpartum depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The husband, Cliff Harshman, in an act of heroism, reported that he “begged God to forgive her” as Tranyelle was lying on her hospital bed. He said that he does not view her “as a monster” because she was both a loving wife and mother. He reflected on his wife’s struggles over the past five years, concluding that she was very troubled and was unable to overcome the psychological challenges.
Forgiving Infidelity Is Not Easy
Image by Monstera Production, Pexels.com
In another recent post (December 17, 2024) on infidelity within a committed relationship, this time on chafai (https://chatfai.com/notes/she-forgave-him-18uvta), Hilary hahn (the last name is not capitalized in the post) goes back and forth on the theme of forgiveness. In her case, the emotional wounds still are very fresh because, in her words, “It’s been a few days since that incident…..” She courageously states that she is in stunned disbelief. Forgiving him “feels like an insurmountable task.” Near the end of the post, she is hoping that in the future she “will look back on this moment as a turning point, a moment where compassion triumphed over hatred, and love conquered all.” This is a very noble statement, given the freshness of her emotional wounds.
Forgiving Infidelity in a Marriage
Image by alleksana, Pexels.com
In an August 12, 2024, post on MentalHealth.com, Dana Vince reports on a married couple, Toby and Shannon, who overcame a year-long affair that Toby had with an ex-girlfriend from college. What helped was for each of them to see the weaknesses that each brought to that year. For Toby, he opened up about a conflicted family while growing up and being bullied in the past by peers. He brought a feeling of inadequacy into the marriage, and when Shannon began to work long hours, his feelings of inadequacy increased. Shannon, in their time of forgiveness, seeking forgiveness, and reconciliation, began to give more attention to the marriage so that Toby felt more of a sense of commitment on her part and on his. Their exploring weaknesses was not to find excuses for the affair but instead to better understand each other, aid each other in their weaknesses, and increase confidence in the marriage. It worked and they developed a qualitatively better marriage than prior to the challenging year.
Forgiveness as Part of Pre-Marital Preparation
Image by Irina Iriser, Pexels.com
On November 19, 2024, Dr. Enright posted an essay on the Psychology Today website with a focus on forgiveness being a part of pre-marital preparation. Too often, this issue of learning about forgiving one another in the future, once married, is not given sufficient attention. The essay suggests the following points:
- Examine the injustices suffered while growing up so that the residual anger does not come into the marriage;
- Forgive those from the past who have hurt you because of unjust treatment;
- Bring this learning about forgiving into the marriage, with the commitment to practice forgiving in the marriage;
- Be prepared to teach your children about forgiveness so that they can be prepared for unjust treatment toward them in the future.
Three Interviews by the Media in November 2024
Image by Madison Inouye, Pexels.com
Dr. Enright had three media interviews this month with the following media outlets:
- Interview with Yowei Shaw and “Erin,” PROXY podcast by Apple, on the themes of betrayal and forgiveness, November 19, 2024.
- Interview with Makai Allbert, reporter for the international newspaper, The Epoch Times, on the themes of resentment and forgiveness, November 18, 2024.
- Interview with Dr. Rodrigo Nardi, psychiatrist, for his podcast with the New England Psychiatry Mentoring Institute, on the topic of forgiveness therapy, November 16, 2024.
