In Chapter 5 of your book, Forgiveness Is a Choice, you mention six psychological defenses that people typically use to ward off anxiety (denial, suppression, repression, displacement, regression, and identification). Which one is the most destructive, do you think?
Displacement does the most damage because a person’s misery can be spread to many others across a lifetime. Repression may be the most damaging for the one who was hurt because the insights about what really happened may not easily emerge. The person treated unjustly may not even be aware of why he or she is so angry. Without the insight, there may be no forgiveness because there is no motivation to forgive. After all, if one cannot recall who was hurtful, there will be little progress in being motivated to forgive.
Forgiveness Is a Choice, by Dr. Robert D. Enright