If I “accept the pain” in forgiving, as you say, can I always handle this by myself or might I need help from others some of the time?
Let us take a physical analogy. Suppose you hurt your knee while running. You probably know when that pain is so strong as to require medical intervention and when it is not. It is the same with emotional pain. If it is strong and on-going, then it is good to seek help from others, perhaps a family member or friend if the pain is not very severe. If it is very severe, it is best to seek professional help, especially from someone who understands forgiveness and knows the forgiveness process.