Does it take a long time to forgive someone?

The length of time will vary depending on how experienced a person is with the practice of forgiveness, how deeply the person was hurt, who hurt the person, whether or not the  other person is still being hurtful, and whether or not the other has apologized and seems sincere in that. Even if you are faced with the situation in which you have not practiced forgiveness much, you are deeply hurt, by someone who is supposed to love you, with on-going injustice and no apology, it still is possible to forgive.  It may take six months; it may take a year.  Yet, you likely will sense the progress being made (reduced anger, a confidence in the process, as examples).  So, do not think about forgiveness as “all or nothing.”  In other words, you will not need a year before you start to feel some psychological relief.  The positive changes can be rewarding and increase your motivation to keep on the forgiveness path.

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Categories: Ask Dr. Forgiveness

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