When a person forgives, is this an exercise in offering fairness to the one who behaved badly, or is it an act of mercy in which I give more than what is deserved?
You have a good sense of mercy when you say it is giving more than what is deserved. In contrast, justice is giving what is deserved. When you give forgiveness to someone who hurt your heart, on its highest level, you are offering agape love or goodness toward the other, even when it is painful to do so. This is going well beyond justice, or giving what is deserved in light of the unjust behavior. What is deserved in a justice sense is admonition, an attempt to correct the behavior, or perhaps imprisonment in the case of severe, law-breaking actions. Therefore, it follows that what you offer in forgiveness is mercy that goes well beyond justice. Please keep in mind that when you offer forgiveness, you also can strive for justice. For example, if a person is guilty of assault and is ordered to serve a sentence, you can forgive and support the person’s imprisonment.
