My son keeps rejecting my attempt to encourage him to forgive two students who have been bullying him at school. What would you recommend as a new approach that might be effective?
When people hesitate to forgive, my experience is that they do not truly understand what forgiveness is. So, I recommend as a new first step that you ask your son what he means by forgiveness. Listen carefully for any of the following:
To forgive shows weakness or a giving in to the other’s nonsense. This is not true. Your son can forgive from his heart and ask the teachers or the principal for help in stopping the bullying behavior.
To forgive is to reconcile with those who bully, and I do not want to associate with them. This is not true. Forgiveness and reconciliation differ. Forgiveness is a moral virtue that one person willingly chooses through free will. Reconciliation involves two or more people coming together in mutual—mutual—trust. If those who bully cannot be trusted, then reconciliation for now is not recommended.
