I am wondering about the idea that forgiveness involves, as you say, “giving a gift” to the one who was unfair. I can imagine, in some cases, that this could backfire, with the other person rejecting the gift and even being critical of it. What do you think?
Yes, the one who decides to give a gift to the other is taking a risk. Usually, the other is grateful for it, but at times the scenario can unfold as you describe in your question. When that happens, it can catch the gift-giver off guard. This, then, can be another occasion for forgiving to take place. If the forgiver has good reason to fear backlash from the gift-giving, it can be given indirectly, such as donating money to charity in the other’s name without announcing it.
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