In my observing people who have been hurt by others, there seems to be a certain closed-mindedness that makes forgiveness difficult. Here is what I mean: People kind of close down to listening and discussing civilly with others once they have been hurt. Wouldn’t this closed-mindedness to open communication hinder forgiving?
I think you are conflating forgiving and reconciling. You can forgive a person starting within your own heart by committing to do no harm to the other, with a commitment to offering respect and eventually even love (in the sense of agape) toward that other person. This occurs even without communicating with the other person. Reconciliation, in contrast, does require listening and having open communication. So, when this listening and discussing civilly are closed down, this likely will hinder the reconciliation process, but not the process of forgiving.
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