Is it psychologically impossible to “forgive and forget”? Wouldn’t we be eliminating an important lesson in self-protection if we truly succeeded in forgetting the unfair treatment?
When we forgive, we do not forget what happened to us; instead, we remember it in new ways. We can remember the person and the unjust event, and it then passes through our mind and heart without hatred or rage. As an analogy, if you injured your knee five years ago, you can still look back and remember the event, but without the same level of pain you experienced when it happened. Remembering in new ways is our protection. As we remember, we can self-protect against similar injustices in the future.
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