Here is my fourth slogan about forgiveness: “Forgiveness is the struggle to help change the other person so that the injustice stops.”
This desire to help the other is part of forgiveness because, in forgiving, the forgiver wants what is best for the other person. Yet, one can forgive even if the other refuses the forgiver’s overture of mercy and a second chance. The struggle to help change the person runs deeper when the goal is reconciliation, or coming together again in mutual trust, which does not always happen. When reconciliation is not possible, a person still can forgive by wishing the other well, having mercy on the other, and hoping that reconciliation might be possible in the future, without demanding that reconciliation.
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