Is there a distinction between wishing people well and forgiving them? Though I still harbor strong feelings of resentment toward my ex-husband, I wish him well. He violated the terms of our marriage.

In his book, Forgive and Forget, the late Lewis Smedes pointed out that when people wish the other person well, they begin to forgive. You are probably only starting the process of forgiving, which is a good thing. You now have to keep moving toward a deeper forgiveness. As you go through this, try to see your ex-husband’s worth; consider his emotional wounds, which may have played a role in the breakup. Try to be mindful of any compassion that may be developing inside you. According to our scientific studies, the outcome most likely will be reduced anger.

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