I am in a rather caustic group, with lots of criticism leveled against others outside the group. It is beginning to wear on me, and I am thinking of leaving the group. What do you think: would it be better for me to stay and try to help them bring down their level of criticism toward others, or should I leave?
You show both courage and altruism in asking this question. I say this because your intent in staying is to help members of the group, rather than staying for your own benefit. Yes, it may be a morally good response to stay in the group, at least for a while, to see if you can temper their discontent. Yet, please monitor your own emotions so that you do not overdo the staying. A key factor is this: are the group members ready to change? If so, what is your evidence? Do you think they will be ready for this positive change in the future? Your answers to these questions might help you discern whether a genuine reconciliation between the group and you is possible. Yes, try to help them, but at the same time, monitor your emotions so that you are protected from the ongoing criticism you describe in your question.
